23 October 2010

Speaking of modesty....

Modesty, a subject often spoken about in our home. Maybe it has a little something to do with having several daughters that it keeps coming up. It is a topic of much discussion in our home as we strive to raise our daughters to be "in the world" but not "of the world." I found it interesting when I looked the word up in the 1828 Dictionary of Noah Webster~That lowly temper which accompanies a moderate estimate of one's own worth and importance. This temper when natural, springs in some measure from timidity, and in young and inexperienced persons, is allied to bashfulness and diffidence. In persons who have seen the world, and lost their natural timidity, modesty springs no less from principle than from feeling, and is manifested by retiring, unobtrusive manners, assuming less to itself than others are willing to yield, and conceding to others all due honor and respect, or even more than they expect or require.

It goes on to say~Modesty, as an act or series of acts, consists in humble, unobtrusive deportment, as opposed to extreme boldness, forwardness, arrogance,presumption, audacity or impudence. The word is also used as synonymous with chastity, or purity of manners. In this sense, modesty results from purity of mind, or from the fear of disgrace and ignominy fortified by education and principle. Unaffected modesty is the sweetest charm of female excellence, the richest gem in the diadem of their honor.

As we see here, modesty is NOT just about what we wear! I Samuel 16-7~For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." Well now, that's a relief right? Now we have biblical proof that we can 'gloss' over the subject of dressing modestly. WAIT, that doesn't sound right! I Timothy 2:8-10~ "I desire therefore that the men pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting; in like manner also, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing, but which is proper for women professing godliness with good works."

Let's end the "Hostage Crisis" by determining right now that we will no longer follow the trends of our decadent culture. In matters of personal holiness, why not shoot on the high side? The church is a Bride, not a harlot. Let's determine to adorn ourselves modestly, both inwardly and outwardly.~Harold Vaughan

God promises blessing to obedient children. That should be a powerful motivation for Christian parents because they love their children and want God’s blessing upon them. Today, many parents have developed a pattern of responding to their children rather than instructing and training them. They spend a lot of energy negotiating with their children, often lowering some standard in the process. Parents have been seduced by self-esteem propaganda (e.g., "My son is student of the month at…") and the very liberal idea that a family should be a mini-democracy. The result is child-centered family relationships that may have more in common with anarchy than Biblical order and harmony.

Joshua declared before all the people, "but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord." For Joshua, serving the Lord was a family affair. His was a right-side-up view of family. Christian parents, standing together as "benevolent dictators," should be teaching their children respect for the holiness of God in every area of life ― even when they don’t like it. Parents who model and enforce Biblical moral and ethical values consistently in the family home are protecting their children by setting standards of thought and conduct that will help keep them anchored spiritually and socially as they mature.


Mrs. Trixi said...

Wonderful post!!

dggp said...

This is a great post Tricia. It is a constant battle it seems today to encourage our daughters in this. Learning to sew has been helpful to us in that we can choose what clothing choices we desire instead of being left to the goods found in the stores.

Anonymous said...

And what a challenge it is. Thanks for sharing.


Ruby said...

And not only is a great post about a biblical concept, modesty of heart and appearence, but those beautiful girls just look sooooo much nicer than the half dressed models we see all the time!
I love to see brides with sleeves and looking lovely and sweet on their wedding day, too. Thanks, Tricia. You are giving a great example here.

Heidi said...

This is what I want for my daughters too. How do I get there? I just moved to an area where we are surrounded by Amish and Mennonite. It is more the Mennonites that I am impressed with. Their daughters glow with modesty, inside and out, like your daughters. I would like to understand the modesty principle better. Great post!

Chad and Jessica's Family: said...

You have beautiful girls. I really love the pic of you with all the matching little girls!!!! You are right, it is not just outward modesty, it is inward too. I pray for that in my girl(soon to be girls) and just that they are pure and have high standards for a husband one day and that he desire a pure and modest bride!!!!


Pam said...

Excellent post. You and the girls are beautiful and it is your smiling faces and sparkling eyes that draw us to Jesus; and we are not stumbled by looking elsewhere. Love the definition from Websters. Excellent.

Stacie, A Firefighter's Wife said...

It truly is amazing how much I hear moms telling me they are negotiating with their daughters over modesty! I am truly appalled. Why do they have a choice? When they live in our house, they will follow the rules. My hubby and I are adament that our boys and girls will dress modestly. It is a virtue that is very important. How we dress, does imply to a certian degree what we value.

Your daughteres are beautiful! Thank you for sharing the pictures.

I just did a post on this, too. I took my daughter shopping for the first time. It was fun to weed through the "bad" clothes and find that we were in complete agreement on what was appropriate.

H West said...

Just found your blog and I'm leaving a comment about another post. . .that picture of the little girl in the basketball hoop has me giggling hysterically!!!! LOVE kids!!!!

Anonymous said...

Such a meaningful post! Thank you for sharing :)

I hope that you'll be able to join us in the Thanksgiving posts. I'd really love to glean wisdom of gratitude from you!

Jessica said...

Great Post! Thank you!!!

Thankfully my oldest child right now is 4 our only girl at this point.

I try to teach her by example, and I make most of my clothing as well as hers and I do some stuff for the boys as well :)


Amanda said...

This is a wonderful post Tricia... true modesty starts in the heart, and flows outward.

I too, love the photos of your girls and you.

I think in some families, the parents cater to the children to the extent that they forget who is the one in authority.

I loved the points you made in this post.

Mountain Home Quilts said...

Thanks for sharing your heart and the great definition from Mr. Webster. Modesty is vital, I can't stress that enough! I am thankful that the Lord is so good to give us direct instructions in His word.

char said...

"As for me AND my house...." Exactly!! I can't help but be reminded of a conversation I had with my aunt as she was complaining about the strict dress code at the private Christian school her daughter attended. She said "I would NEVER ask my daughter(12) to wear a skirt that went all the way to her knees." to which I replied "exactly, I never ASK my girls either!"

Chris in FL--Joyful Mother said...

Yep...it's all about training them from very young what it means to be modest.

Great post :)


momoflots said...

We also speak about modesty a lot here. Some years ago our former pastor's daughter wore one of the most revealing dresses I had ever seen to church (extremely short, plunging neckline - nothing to the imagination) - I kinda mentioned to the pastor's wife that her daughter must have been chilly as it was only March and she wore no wrap. The wife said that clothing was a battle she chose not to have!!! Very soon after that our pastor left the ministry and his daughter became a single mother. I could not imagine letting that slide - we have talked about modesty for years around here - what it means and how to live it - it's not just about clothes but about the state of your heart!!! Thanks for this post - this is a subject that in not spoken about enough!!


T's Daily Treasures said...

Thanks for stopping by my corner of the world. One of my very best friend has 7 kids and I thought that was a lot, but you are a mommy x 12 and what a beautiful family you have.

Having lived in the Middle East for 16 years now, I have definitely become very modest in my outward appearance. And as I age, I find that inward modesty is much more becoming.

God Bless you for homeschooling. I thought about it some years ago but realized I would never be able to have such dedication.

Have a great rest of the week. :) Tammy

Carrie of Farming On Faith said...

Oh what beautiful girls you have.
Yes~ I agree with you so much on this one.
Hope you are having a wonderful evening!

Blessedmom's Simple Home said...

What a wonderful post. It's a frequent topic around here too :-)

Anonymous said...

I really enjoyed reading this. We constantly, as a people need to be purging our bodies and hearts in order to stay pure and holy as this speaks of.


Regan Family Farm said...

Thank you for visiting the farm, Tricia! I intend to spend more time visiting with you too. Your blog looks beautiful, and I can tell you have much that would encourage my heart.
Sending a hug from the farm~

Mrs. Stam said...

well said, modesty from inside out will show on the outside(choice of clothing often reflect the heart) Thanks for sharing this post!